Herbology

Billywig Tail Drug Use Takes a Turn for the Worse
By Kate Granger

The billywig is a strange creature that looks rather like a top. It spins around so fast it is sometimes hard to see. It¹s a very harmless animal, but there have recently been complaints from people to get the billywigs in their area relocated, or worse, exterminated! These recent complaints have nothing to do with what the billywig is doing, but instead what witches and wizards are using it for. You see, the billywig's tail is an illegal drug.

Recently many deaths and illnesses have been blamed on this drug, sometimes called billytail. Billytail is especially popular in the ghettos of the wizard world.

In case you're wondering what billytail does to its users, here's what:

First, the user gets a funny butterfly feeling in their stomach. Then, they begin to giggle uncontrollably. Depending on the amount of the injection, the user may also levitate. This isn't so bad, and billytail is sometimes used in small amounts in anti-depressant spells, but too much may cause addiction. Over-dosage may result in permanent levitation or the person may NEVER be able to strop giggling. Howver, the user may be able to get a rehabilitation spell to stop addiction and get rid of these long term affects. However, if the user isn't saved in time, billytail over-dosage may result it expiration! (In other words, the person will die a gruesome death!!)

So, young witches and wizards who may be reading this, NEVER take billytail! Even though it's harmless the first few times, it WILL have very bad affects later on.

Disclaimer- I thought I should put a disclaimer on this one, since it delt with drugs. This story has absolutely NOTHING to do with drugs in the real world (like marajauna) If you happen to find anything in this article that seems to you to be refering to real drugs, IT DOESNT!! And if this article somehow offended you because you for some crazy reason are a drug user yourself, or know someone who is, or happen to have a pet named billytail, I¹m sorry this has offended you. Dont even think about it. Print it out and rip it to shreds. Send me 50 complaining emails. Just don¹t let it bother you.

New Garden At Hogwarts
By Hermiona Pisces-Dumbledore

For the past six weeks at Hogwarts, a big garden had been under construction. Once it is done, there will be a ton of flowers, I think over 100 kinds, bordering carved pictures of the school founders, past and present teachers, and P&P Headmasters made from yew and evergreen. Then around the borders there will be several plants and bushes, and big funny shaped flower beds. Once completed, the finished date to be in about ay year, I'm positive it will be gorgeous. I saw, yesteray, them working on Helga Hufflepuff, and boy, was it magnifincent.

Kicked Out!
By Auburn Dothonlock

It is half an inch long and a vivid sapphire blue, although its speed is such that it is rarely noticed by Muggles and often not by wizards until they have been stung.

Yesterday, a student of Beaxbatons Academy of Magic was expelled from school for a Herbology incident. It seems that Belle Junorelle, while not doing her homework, she also did not pay attention in class. When it came time for the final exam, dealing with Billywigs, she had no idea what to do. For all of you who do not know what a Billywig is, here is some background information: The Billywig is an insect native to Australia. It is around half an inch long and a vivid sapphire blue, although its speed is such that it is rarely noticed by muggles and often not by wizards until they have been stung. The Billywigs wings are attached to the top of its head and are rotated very fast so that it spins as it flies. At the bottom of the body is a long thin stinger. Those who have been stung by a Billywig suffer giddiness followed by levitation. Well, mistaking Professor Kimplan's words, which were, "Please grab the Billywigs in the jar and cut off their stingers with the spell we learned last week." She thought the Professor said, "Please grab the billywigs in the jar let them cut off your fingers with the spell they learned last week." Belle then got up, screamed, "I'm keeping my fingers!" and let broke all of the glass jars containing Billywigs.

Since they were all trapped in a greenhouse, the Billywigs went crazy stinging student. A total of 279 stings were found in students. Belle was expelled for causing harm to students and being a troublesome student. Neither her parents nor her had any comments, but one thing can be determined, Beauxbatons students will all be paying attention in Herbology next class.

Snails of a Different Color
By Stephanie Bagshot

Recently, a new animal has been destroying crops and vegetation. (And no, it's not your normal bug.) The Streeler is certainly doing its part in vegetation destruction. The Streeler is a giant snail that changes color on an hourly basis and deposits a trail so venomous that it shrivels and burns all vegetation over which it passes. Streelers are normally good-natured animals, and are kept as pets by some wizards who like their many colors, but recently, they are nothing but a threat to the environment. A local wizard, Norman Greensgiver, was known for raising them, and then selling them as pets. However, on Monday, his security charm stopped working, letting all the Steelers run free from their cages. Greensgiver wasn't home, and when he returned there was nothing left but a trail of dead vegetation. The Magical Investigators of Magical Mishaps and Mistakes is looking into the case of his broken security charm, seeing if it was just a defect in the spell, or if it was broken by someone else. Fellow witches and wizards are currently trying to track these creatures down before they leave half the country in ruins. If you see one simply point your wand at them and say 'Snufflehidget' and they will transport them to the care and safety of the Ministry of Magic.

Whomping Willow Claims Victim
By Ko Belladonna

Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Friday, midnight: a 5th year Hogwarts student, on a dare with two of his friends, tried to get past the infamous Whomping Willow's flailing branches in order to touch its trunk. The student, one Ackerly Phipps, is in severe condition with numerous cuts, contusions, lacerations, bruises, and bumps, as well as a concussion and a broken wrist, finger, arm, leg, ankle, and collarbone. " That tree really worked him over," said Ernie Macmillan, a friend of Phipps'. " And he lost his dare, too- and here I had 7 Galleons saying that he'd make it to the trunk. Drat." Acting on a complaint from Phipps' mother, the Hogwarts Board of Governors has instructed Hogwarts headmaster Albus Dumbledore to look into ways of reducing the risk of injury from the Whomping Willow. Options such as creating an invisible wall around the tree, digging a moat around the tree, and pruning the tree have been discussed. At the time of this article, no plans have been made to get rid of the tree entirely, though the idea has been discussed. Professor Dumbledore declined to comment. Professor Sprout, Hogwarts' herbology teacher, exclaimed "It would be a crime to prune or destroy that tree! It's one of only three Whomping Willows left in Europe." Assistant Headmistress Minerva McGonagall was overheard telling one of the school's Governors, "We will not get rid of a rare tree specimen just because some silly little boy decides to take a dare. Hah! Since when has this school given in to such nonsense?". Phipps is said to be healing normally under the competent care of Madam Pomfrey, the Hogwarts nurse.

Professor Sprout: Knocked Out
by Auburn Dothonlock

A baby mandrake, they only knock you out, but twenty baby mandrakes can do serious harm.

Professor Sprout of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry has been knocked unconscious by a baby Mandrake. As it turns out, a student of hers decided to play alittle prank on her and take all of the baby mandrakes out of the dirt and escape with the earmuffs. Innocent Professor Sprout entered the greenhouse to do her daily work and was knocked out by about twenty baby mandarkes crying. The school nurse had no comment on Professor Sprout's conditions, but it has been known that she has been knocked out for several days, most unusual for a baby mandrake's scream, though it was twenty. Then, the story twisted, it seemed that the Gryffindors, Hufflepuffs,and Ravenclaws were very saddened by the news of Professor Sprout. The Slytherins however were jumping for joy. I immediately knew that one of the Slytherins had done it. I'm going to use my Polyjuice Potion tonight and find out who it was, I will tell you in my next article! Get well, Professor Sprout!

Truthful Trees in Danger
By Ko Belladonna

Wizards all across Africa are fighting to save the last of the Flimflam trees, a magical species of tree found only in central Africa. The Flimflam has been revered since ancient times, because no person can tell a lie while touching the tree. Many a criminal, naughty child, and husband of questionable faithfulness has been questioned under a flimflam tree, forcing them to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth (not always a pretty sight). The flimflam is today used as a main ingredient in Veritaserum, a powerful potion that allows all of us here in other parts of the world to guarantee truthfulness as much as our African friends.

Unfortunately, the flimflam trees has fallen victim to a mysterious plague. Here is what my friend Angezama in Kampala, Uganda had to say about the trees' illness: "The flimflams first develop odd green/yellow boils on their bark, and then their leaves become translucent and fall off; following this, the tree begins to slowly die. The entire process takes less than three weeks. Last year, before the plague, there were about 500 flimflams alive in Africa (mainly in Uganda, Tanzania, Rwanda, Burundi, and Zaire). Today, there are only 10 left. Of these, 6 appear to already be developing boils on their bark. The 4 unaffected trees are being carefully protected by highly trained wizards from three African Ministries of Magic."

Meanwhile, tree experts from all over the world are racing to find a cure for the flimflams, which are an essential ingredient in many other potions besides Veritaserum, including some very powerful magical medicines: "If the flimflams go extinct, it'll be much harder to make a lot of important medicines, including a lot of potions used for curse reversal. The loss of the flimflam could go hard on us and our patients," warns Ms. Fridda Holfing, a doctor at St. Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies.

As to the plague itself, it seems to be magical in origin- the normal plant disease remedies aren't working. Could this be the work of a Dark wizard? Only time will tell.

The Ugandan Quidditch team, the Patonga Proudsticks, will be holding a flying exhibition in France (where they recently beat France's Quiberon Quafflepunchers by a score of 190-30!), as a fundraiser to help European wizards who are experts in tree botany take off time in their own jobs to travel to Africa and help work out a cure for the nicknamed "truth trees". Stay tuned for updates.

M.E.S.S. asks for Mandrake Equality!
By Ko Belladonna

Plant or person? A controversy has recently come up over the classification of Mandrakes as plants rather than members of the magical community. For those of you that don’t know, Mandrakes are plants that are used in advanced potions. The roots are in the form of a person, and a full-grown Mandrake’s cry is fatal.

Fern Kermpillius, of the Ministry of Magic’s Magical Botany and Herbology Unit, said Monday, “For crying out loud, the things are deadly! What are you going to do, ask them their opinions? You’d be dead! Their cries kill! They will never be classified as anything more than a dangerous plant. What will these nutters think of next? It’s just not going to happen.” Ms. Kermpillius was not available for questions, as she chose that moment to disappear in a huff of green smoke.

In an interview on Friday, Mrs. Becky Amaplantum, the founder of the Mandrake Equal Suffrage Society (otherwise known as the M.E.S.S.), who originally began the whole Mandrake equality movement, stated: “It’s discrimination, that’s what it is! The poor dears can’t help it that their voices do harm! The M.E.S.S. is requesting that Mandrakes be classified as members of the magical community by the Ministry of Magic. We will fight until the finish for Mandrake empowerment!” When asked how people would deal with the deadly cries, let alone how they would give the cries meaning if they could listen to them safely, Mrs. Amaplantum unfortunately remembered an urgent appointment with her dentist and had to leave.

Asked for her opinion on Mandrake equality, Professor Sprout, the herbology teacher at Hogwarts School, replied “Poppycock!” and stated that she would let the Venomous Tentacula loose if she wasn’t left alone.

Unfortunately, no Mandrakes could be asked their opinion on this matter (for obvious reasons). Minister of Magic Cornelius Fudge declined to comment.

New Magical Herb Invented
By Auburn Dothonlock

As we all know, there are plenty magical herbs in our world; Mandrakes, Forget-Me-Nots, Honeysuckles, etc. But what happens when you invent a magical herb? Well that's exactly what the Department of Herbology in the Ministry of Magic did. They invented a magical herb that is actually a combination of Floo Grass, Mugglewart, Juumbly Gum Tree, and Merweed. The Ministry of Magic actually took seeds of each of these plants, put them in a Muggle "blender" and grounded them all up into tiny pieces. Then, they cast a spell on it to form one big seed. They've planted it and it has finally started to bloom! What does this new magical herb do? Well, you are now able to ride on this magical herb. However, it will not be available to the wizarding public because it could cause too many accidents and should only be used by special authorities. Now, the Floo Grass, stem plant of Floo Powder, mixed with Merweed, actually makes the plant able to levitate. The Mugglewart bush and Juumbly Gum Tree make it steady enough for someone to ride on it. Also, you get a wonderful refreshing treat of gumdrops as you ride from the tree. What is this new magical herb called - Heximer. The invention of Heximer will probably not be the last magical herb invented - we anticipate more invented herbs to come!

As you can see, the Heximer is the round plant in the middle, and is perfect for a rider to ride on it.

Muggle Plus Mandrake Equals Disaster
By Kristen Kholor

On November 2, 2001, a very unlucky muggle by the name of Jake Armbruster happened to be weeding his mother's garden when he came across a strange weed. Ten year old Jake rushed into the house to ask his mother if he should get rid of it. His mother told him to to go on and get rid of it. Well poor Jake just happened to come across a mandrake. Since the mandrake was just a baby, it's cry was not, thankfully, fatal. The Ministry rushed in and performed some memory charms. Young Jake was then taken to a nearby hospital. "The Ministry will have quite a job cleaning this up!" quoted a Ministry representative who wished to remain anonymous. Thankfully, Jake was unharmed.

Forget-me-not: A Regular Plant or a Magical Herb?
By Alex Granger

“Forget-me-not” is known to be a very bright-blue beautiful flower which symbols friendship and loyalty, but it being a magical herb was totally out of the question…until yesterday when a very old wizard died, his wife (a Muggle) loved him too much, and she wouldn't bury him, so the priest came and they performed the ceremony while his body lay in a glassy coffin, his wife went to her garden, and picked a forget-me-not flower, which was the brightest of all and placed it on her dead husbands chest. As one of the ceremony's witnesses said, the flower lit up and rose into the air and spun around and around, the next thing he saw was the dead wizard come back to life, I was called to that place and found some people laughing the others crying, I asked the old wizards wife to take the flower and examine it at my friend’s lab, Tom Bricknocks, since there were too many questions to ask, for instance:
Does only this flower have those magical powers?
Does it work on all people or on wizards only?
Can only that Muggle have the powers to heal?

So I took the flower to my friends, and after two hours he came back with those results:
A. The flower is magical.
B. Nothing different have been given to this flower from all the others in the garden.
C. The reason for it being magical is unknown yet.

That confused me, so I investigated more and found out that the spot that the magical flower has been on in the muggle’s garden was once enchanted by a great sorcerer.

But again, there was one question left: Can only that Muggle have the powers to heal using that forget-me-not flower?

So I investigated more, and to my shock I found out that that particular Muggle was no other than a witch whose post to go to the school of witchcraft and wizardry was lost on its way and wasn't received by the old woman.

So I stringed all the facts together with help of some research and heres what I came out with:

Every plant who was planted on an enchanted spot or place (like the Enchanted forest) have magical powers, only witches and wizards who haven't received school owls are given those great powers as a “We're very sorry” present!

As for the flower, it was put in Wistington Museum of Irregular Wizarding Objects, and we encourage people on researching books on enchanted spots … maybe your garden have an enchanted flower.

As for the old wizard, he’s expected to live for another 35 years or so, and his wife was astonished to hear she was a witch and she was rewarded 1000 galleons for discovering something new, and .. well .. it is revealed that some Muggles aren't Muggles but wizards and witches.

~ Alex ~